Where do I start?

WARNING: If you are weak in the stomach this post is NOT for you! Please skip down to the more pleasant posts about Christmas and new lamps.

I had just gotten out of the shower and Nash was screaming in his crib trying to go to sleep. I thought I heard another cry but wasn't sure. After a few minutes I was sure I heard Kai crying in the basement. So I ran down there and followed that cry to the bathroom. I walked into a room covered in poo: the walls, sink, toilet, ground, and of course my son! To make matters worse there was toilet paper everywhere.
Apparently Kai had to go so he ran to the bathroom but didn't make it in time and went in his underwear. Then he took them off and sat on the seat (which explains the dirty toilet) then finished in the toilet but got off too soon and put some on the floor too. He decided he need to clean it up so he grabbed toilet paper and put it all over the floor. Somehow it was on his feet, hands, legs, and face. Yuck! Are you grossed out yet? Hang in there! I stuck him in the shower, which he is afraid of, and had to wipe him down. Then I cleaned the bathroom again! (I just cleaned it yesterday, moped and all!) All the while Nash was STILL screaming.

No one every tells you these joys of parenthood. Just about the sweet things your children do and the wonderful smell of a baby. I think someone needs to talk about the TRUTH: You will be puked on from time to time and cleaning up poop is under the description of MOM.